We the undersigned demand the following...

"Thousands of Beyonce fans have begun a petition to have her new video banned."

Banned? BANNED! Why? you ask. Does she insult the Christians? The Jews? The Muslims? Not quite.

"Citing an apparent lack of theme, poor editing, and unsuitable wardrobe, the petition insists "Déjà Vu" be redone." [link]

Theme? Like The Remorse of Conscience? The Deceptiveness of Fate? What kind of fans are these?

We the undersigned demand that Beyoncé Giselle Knowles use imagery and metaphor to exemplify the Predatory Nature of Human Existence. Failure to do so will result in an immediate boycott of the video "Déjà Vu" until that video is repealed and reinstated in an altered version of high integrity. This is to be decided by this governing body. Thank You.

-Signed, a Pissed Yeti